Is It Lunchtime Yet?

My husband and I are fortunate enough to run our own business, so we bring Coda to our office every day. You might assume we run a warehouse or maybe own a pet store. Nope. We work in a Class A building beside engineering companies and Realtor offices. Coda prances through the glass entrance and even rides in the elevator. Of course, Coda is all business on work days. Well, almost.

When Coda was a puppy, we knew taking him to the office had to wait until he stopped chewing table legs and nearby toes. Our employees are dog lovers, but there's a limit. The job requirements for Coda were straight forward. So once we thought he was a well-trained, quiet Labrador, we brought him in for an interview.

The interview consisted of letting Coda sniff the carpets, and staff. He was about five months old and still wiggly, but he knew his commands and responded to them most of the time. Early on, Coda charmed everyone. He sat for a quick petting, didn't bark at the UPS driver, and even flopped on a makeshift bed in my office. "He's a natural," we thought. I should have known it was too soon to order business cards.

At first I watched Coda like a hawk. He did well. The moment I turned my back, however, I heard, "He's got an envelope!" I peered out my office and saw Coda jumping around with a giant padded bubble envelope. Our reception area is a great circle track - great for a dog playing keep away. After several laps, I wrestled the envelope from Coda and dragged him back to my office. But it was too late. The real Coda was unleashed.

Coda bounded into cubicles and found sections of wall to nibble. He discovered where we kept the paper reams and was quite good at pulling out sheets and tearing them to bits. When we moved the paper, he moved on to trash cans. I was ready to give up and leave him home, but my husband was more patient. I seem to recall the words "Maybe the puppy will listen to his father." We still laugh about that.

It was a normal workday and Coda was lying quietly in daddy's office. At first I thought there was something to the old adage - wait till your father gets home. Then my husband asked, "Did the network go down?" The system was fine. So what happened? Can you guess? Coda had been quiet in daddy's office all right; quietly chewing through all of the network cords. They were in pieces beside Coda, now with a satisfied grin.

Coda eventually matured and is good at the office now. Once in a while he still steals an envelope and runs around as if longing for his youth, but mostly he plays with his toys and lets Grandpa take him for walks. It's a good arrangement, and it keeps Coda off the streets. Yes, there was a time when, well, we thought Coda might end up a gutter pup. Maybe it was when he literally ended up in the gutter.

Making A Splash

One of our best doggy outings is the Bark-N-Splash. Just before the City closes the community pool for the winter, they put up extra fences and let dogs run amok. It’s great fun to see hundreds of romping dogs in all shapes and sizes. The bulldog in his orange lifejacket is still my favorite.

As you can imagine, Coda-the-water-hound loves this event. He’s been twice. The second time he did quite well if you overlook his sudden compulsion for Frisbees. He somehow got it in his head that every plastic disc, including a rogue clipboard, belonged to him. Coda’s first time at the pool, however, was another, more interesting, story.

At just over a year old, Coda had only been to the lake where he busied himself eating sticks at the shoreline. He had never tried a pool, but Labs are born swimmers. So when Coda bounded through the Bark-N-Splash entrance and plunged in with his usual abandon, I never considered Coda would find himself, quite literally, in the deep end.

I remember watching Coda do a belly flop, but then I was distracted by the pandemonium. There were dogs everywhere. When I glanced back to the pool, Coda had bobbed up to the surface with a smile. I was impressed. He was carrying a ball and swimming toward the edge with speed and grace. It wasn’t until he got closer that I saw he had changed his collar. As I searched for Coda, I also realized the water was teeming with Yellow Labs. But then I spotted my boy and cringed. Coda was flailing about, trying to swim using only his two front legs.

There was no way I was jumping into the mayhem to rescue Coda, so I coached him from the sidelines as if he could understand my yelling, “Use your back legs. It’s called dog paddling.” Eventually Coda made it to the edge, but he couldn’t get himself over the lip. In his thrashing about he failed to notice the huge lagoon entrance where dogs were walking in and out of the pool. Nevertheless, he had his paws on the edge and a nearby Samaritan fished him out. I was grateful until the man commented on the drowning victim and said, “I’ve never seen a Lab that couldn’t swim.” What could I say? Neither had I.

Once out of the water, I wasn’t surprised that Coda didn’t jump back into the fray. Still, Coda wasn’t too fazed by his near-death experience. Alongside the pool was a grassy area where vendors set up small booths selling toys and treats. Coda went to check it out. This was when I noticed the display tables weren’t very high, and Coda-the-thief was already tall for a Lab. Houston we have a problem.

Coda decided to “sample” the biscuits. After he had stolen untold numbers of treats, plus a rubber chicken I managed to return undamaged, the vendors got wise and moved their wares to higher ground. Even so, these naive sellers thought Coda’s antics were adorable and kept giving him treats. I finally had to tell them my little “chubs” was done. With the treats stopped, Coda started back toward the pool. I tried, but it was no use. I just couldn’t get Coda to wait 30 minutes before going back in the water.

We spent two hours at that first Bark-N-Splash. By the end, Coda found the lagoon entrance but not his back legs. At least he was easy to spot. Still, my husband and I decided we needed to teach our Labrador how to swim. I had visions of Coda in floaties with his paws wrapped around Daddy’s neck. Thankfully it never came to that.

At our next lake outing Coda remembered his retriever heritage and finally figured out using all four legs was much easier. He’s a swimmer now, though I can’t say he’s a good swimmer. I’ve never seen a big dog swim so slowly. But he loves it as much as he loves going to our office. Have I mentioned Coda’s a working dog? He goes to the office with us everyday. Coda may not be fast in the water, but you should see him with a bubble envelope. Yes, I think it’s time. I think you’re ready for Coda the co-worker.

Say Cheese

After two years, we've yet to get a good photo of Coda. We’ve tried outdoor shots with him lying on the grass and pictures by the fireplace with his stuffed duck. What can I say, Coda's just not photogenic. Until recently, I thought he was just leery of cameras. Turns out Coda’s just leery of us.

The other day Coda was playing with Vienna. Vienna (Black Lab) lives across from the park and is the sweet dog that trots about the neighborhood on her own. Everyone knows and loves Vienna. But on this particular afternoon, Vienna wasn’t out by herself. Vienna’s family was having a reunion.

Thirty people were gathered on the front drive, laughing and talking. They looked like the kind of group you’d love to have at a Bar-B-Que. While the family exchanged greetings, Vienna and Coda merrily played in the park. Then Vienna’s owner called for her. The family was lining up for a group photo and wanted her in the picture. Vienna, the good dog, went right to her owner and sat down where instructed. Then, yet again, Coda shocked me.

Coda ran over to the family, turned toward the camera, and plopped himself right next to Vienna. A professional photographer couldn’t have staged it any better. I called for him, but Coda was suddenly Cindy Crawford and wouldn’t budge. Why wouldn't they want me in the photo? At least everyone was laughing when they took the picture. I tried to convince them the photo was proof Coda now belonged to them, but there were no takers.

Of course Coda still grimaces at our camera and even tried to steal it the other day. No, he hasn’t changed his ways. And now we have to add poser to his growing list of "traits." We’ve yet to determine if this is a passing phase, but at least we finally have a decent photo of Coda.

Next, I'll tell you about Coda's first time at the "Bark-N-Splash." Every summer the community pool is set up so doggies can go for a dip. Labradors are known for their prowess in water, and there were so many Labs in the pool I almost couldn't find Coda. Almost. I didn't even have to look when the man next to me said, "Whose Lab is that? He looks like a drowning victim." Yep, it was you know who.

Stop Thief!

I'm convinced if Coda had thumbs, by now he'd be behind bars in an orange jumpsuit trading favors for cigarettes. There's no way around this...Coda is a thief. His life of crime started early with misdemeanors like lifting socks from the hamper. My husband and I hoped his pilfering was a passing puppy phase, but after this last incident we've lost all hope of our boy having a clean rap sheet.

It might be faster to give you a list of items Coda hasn't stolen. I don't think he's managed a T.V. yet, but he did get at least two cell phones and a set of car keys. If I hadn't stopped him, he'd probably have driven to Mexico. I've lost count of how many toys he's nabbed out of unsuspecting hands. His favorite grab are those plastic Chuckits to throw tennis balls, not to mention the balls themselves. Coda also has a reputation at Dog Park for taking leashes and dumping over a very large water tub and then dragging it around. I don't think he thought that caper through. But by far, Coda's best steal was a shoe. Now you're probably thinking, big deal all dogs steal shoes, but this is Coda we're talking about. If there's one thing Coda's got, it's flair.

Picture Coda at Dog Park on a sunny day. It isn't crowded, but there's a nice gathering. Dogs are happily playing while owners stand in small groups to chat or sit comfortably at benches in the shade. All is peaceful and even Coda seems content chasing a Boxer. That is until Coda spots a lady on a bench and hatches a plan. Why he chose her is still a mystery, but he wags and wiggles right up to her. She is sitting with her legs crossed, wearing a nice pair of leather flip flops. As she reaches down to pat Coda's head, Coda smiles. Then instead of a waiting for his pat, Coda pulls the flip flop right off the lady's foot and makes a dash for it.

Everyone (except of course the lady now missing a shoe) chased Coda around Dog Park while I worried he was slobbering and ruining the nice leather. But why worry about slobber when there's a mud puddle in the corner? Yep, he gave up the chase and dropped that shoe right in the mud. I had to wonder - does Hallmark make a greeting card for this?

I offered to pay for damages, but the one-shoed woman was nice and accepted the flip flop once I rinsed it with the hose. I still wonder if the shoe was completely ruined, but I haven't seen her at the park since. Who can blame her? It's obviously a dangerous neighborhood riddled with hoodlums. Of course, even hoodlums have their softer side.

Just the other day Coda posed like a real gentleman in a beautiful family photo. Too bad it wasn't our family.

Coda and the Cat

A few months ago Coda and I were enjoying a lovely morning walk. He was a true gentleman - didn't pull on the leash, sat at the street corners, and even kept his attention on me when another Lab passed. But then Coda spotted something he'd never seen before.

At first Coda watched the cat from across the street. It was a big, orange Tabby that stared back at us without blinking. "Don't even think about it," I said, knowing Coda didn't stand a chance. But Coda was back to his old self. He lunged forward, yanking the leash right out of my hand, and darted across the street. Thankfully there were no cars. As Coda approached, however, the cat didn't budge.

I suppose a better Mom might have run after Coda, but I stayed back and muttered for him to stop. I was Willy Wonka in the scene when Augustus Gloop falls in the chocolate river (no…stop…don’t…yawn). So I watched as Coda ran up to the kitty and wiggled. He wanted to play. The cat didn't wiggle. The cat stood up on his hind legs and assumed the position.

There was hissing and spitting, following by rapid swatting. Coda was dumbfounded for a few moments, then he began to yelp. Motherly instincts took over, and I did go to Coda's rescue. Coda came right to me without a chase game, and I saw he was bleeding just under his left eye. Another half-inch up and this would be a different story.

The walk home was slow. Coda stayed right by my side and let me dab at his wound with a Kleenex. When we got home, I cleaned him up and put on Neosporin. (Yes, the people kind. My sister's a vet and they use this all the time.) The cut wasn't deep and the bleeding had stopped. I gave him a few kisses on the muzzle and told he was fine. Knowing Coda, I assumed he'd leap up and go run amuck in the yard. You know what they say about assumptions.

Coda stood up and slowly walked into our bedroom. He went into his kennel and curled up into a little ball. He slept all afternoon.

Since the incident, Coda hasn't gone after any more cats. I think what shook him up most was that the cat didn't want to play with him. This made no sense to Coda, who loves everyone.

Still, Coda doesn't seem to have any deep psychological scars. Yesterday he stole the watering can and chew it to bits. Perhaps it's time to tell you more about Coda's thieving. Maybe there's a support group.

Ironic, isn't it...Coda's a bit of a cat burglar.

Happy Birthday, Coda!

Today is Coda's 2nd birthday. To celebrate I gave him a good belly rub and took him for a nice long walk. Now that he's an adult dog of sorts, did Coda thank me with a tail wag or quick lick? Not quite.

During his walk he flopped down on the front lawn of a house with their sprinklers on. He rolled around in the water until soaked and then found a comfortable spot and wouldn't get up.

Maybe he'll mature by his 3rd birthday...but we're not getting our hopes up.

Table for Three?

Coda Cleetis loves to eat. He’s your typical chow hound or anything else hound for that matter. His favorite midnight snack is plastic. When he was just a puppy my husband and I decided we should start taking him to outdoor restaurants. We had always enjoyed taking our previous Labrador out to eat with us and we wanted to teach Coda to stay relaxed in any setting. Surprisingly, Coda was a natural at dining al fresco. He loved being outside and his continued disinterest in humans meant he didn’t try to say hi to anyone. At last, we had found at least one redeeming quality in our Coda. Or so we thought.

One sunny spring day, not too long ago, we took Coda to Rubios. The Rubios by our house has a big outdoor seating area with a fountain. We found a nice spot in the shade and Coda flopped onto the cool concrete. My husband and I had a great chat and didn’t even think about Coda again until our burritos were gone. Then I decided to check on how Coda was doing. We'd never seen anything like it.

Coda was still stretched out, sound asleep on his side. One might think this a good thing, but as you’re getting to know Coda you’re probably already cringing. Coda was sound asleep alright – on the foot of a lady at the next table! He was even snoring. Luckily the lady was a dog lover. I apologized to the woman and woke Coda up, to which he stretched then looked annoyed I was disturbing him. So much for Coda guarding the pack.

We still take Coda out to eat but now were keep a better eye on him and warn the neighboring diners. Not long after the Rubios outing, we took Coda to a local sandwich shop and he went belly up - sound asleep with paws in the air and tongue flopped out. I don’t know about you, but I think that’s just a little too relaxed!

Next time I’ll tell you about Coda and the cat. I’ll put it this way, the cat won.

How Did I Forget Sierra?

In my last post I forgot to mention Sierra. I’m not sure how this is possible since Sierra is the instigator of Coda's clan. She gets Coda in trouble. See, like a good mom I always think it’s the other kid.

Sierra is a Yellow Lab mix. You can usually find Sierra bounding through the neighborhood after slipping her collar. She and Coda are great friends and love to stir up mischief. Case in point – the yard incident.

Coda and Sierra were playing at our neighborhood park. They like to rummage through the bushes to pick up empty water bottles and ticks. One minute they were playing tug with a tree branch and the next they were gone. Sierra’s owner and I started shouting out their names but we didn’t hear anything. We weren’t worried about the danger of a car (our area is very secluded and lends itself nicely to off-leash playing) but where did they go? We were just about ready to start knocking on doors, when all of sudden we heard yelping following by Coda and Sierra running towards us. Something was wrong. At first we couldn’t tell what it was. Then they got closer.

Both dogs were soaking wet. The buddies decided to go snooping and merrily let themselves into a neighbor’s yard. They just didn’t know about the workmen. When the unsuspecting workmen saw two big dogs coming their way, they reacted. Their weapon of choice? The garden hose they were using to water new grass. Coda and Sierra each got a good shot in the snout before turning tail.

Sierra’s owner and I had a good laugh, but the workmen weren’t smiling. We apologized and vowed to discipline our dogs. Of course trying to put a dog in time-out doesn’t really work. So we just had to hope the dousing would teach them their lesson.

Coda and Sierra have since been in four yards, two garages, and a front hall. I think the Labradors are looking for more water!

The Don

Coda plays at our neighborhood park every day. This is where he hangs with the Gambinos. You might think Coda’s the pack leader, but he’s actually the sidekick tripping over his paws. The real Godfather is Grandpa. Dogs run up to him, sit, and lick his ring finger. They know and respect Grandpa’s place. They also know Grandpa carries biscuits.

Grandpa is my father-in-law, and he loves Coda. Because Big G and Coda go for three walks a day, they know everyone in the neighborhood and everyone knows them. Still, only a few friends make up The Family.

Coda’s best amico is Mi (pronounced Me). They met when Coda was a year and Mi was just four months, but Coda was so gentle with his puppy playmate. He’d roll on his back and let Mi jump on his belly and bite his ears with those sharp baby teeth. If there was a yelp, it was from Coda. Today Mi’s all grown and the two of them ambush each other, pin each other by the throat, and knock into each other so hard there’s always yelping.

Capone (yes, Capone) is an Italian Mastiff. At 11 months he’s already 130 pounds! When he puts his giant paw on Coda, he pushes him right to the ground. Luckily, Capone is a sweetie who thinks Coda's a good pisan. Vienna (Black Lab) and Cocoa (Golden Retriever) are the ladies of the group. They’re usually up for a good game of chase but leave the wrestling to the boys.

And where is The Don in all of this? Grandpa sits alone in the gazebo, shadows hiding his face so you see only his eyes watching and waiting. When it’s time to leave, the Godfather signals.

Coda being Coda, when Grandpa calls for him Coda acts like he doesn’t understand English and continues playing. This could go on indefinitely but Grandpa knows the game and makes Coda an offer he can’t refuse. Leave the gun take the rawhide bone.

It’s great my father-in-law gets so much exercise and enjoys spending time with Coda. Plus getting to know our neighbors is an advantage of having such a friendly dog. One of the many disadvantages of Coda’s goofball enthusiasm is often seen when we take him anywhere else but a park – like, say, for example – an outdoor restaurant.

Just a Wee Pup

Like most dogs, Coda’s favorite place is Dog Park. Unlike most dogs, Coda shows his love for the doggy Magic Kingdom by stealing, vandalizing, and defacing.

Our Dog Park is segregated. Small dogs have the front of the park, their area filled with lush grass and a spotless gazebo. From the parking lot, visitors can watch fluffy little bundles trot about in sweaters. Large dogs are forced to a side lot that hasn’t had a blade of grass in years. It’s a dirt pit where water buckets are knocked over, remnants of mud-caked tennis balls line the fence, and park officials removed the shady bench because it was “claimed” so often they grew tired of cleaning it. When Coda was small he played in the garden. The little dogs’ owners thought his smashing into friends was cute. As Coda grew (three pounds a week), his ramming quickly lost appeal and we were tossed, literally, into the dirt.

At this point Coda was only about 30 pounds and ran by kicking out his right hind leg like a palsy victim. I was asked five times if there was something wrong with Coda. Yes, but not with his leg. On Coda’s first day with the big dogs there were other Labs and several medium-sized mutts, so I felt okay about unleashing my little guy into the mayhem. I opened the gate and Coda surged forward like a linebacker. This was when I spotted Max. Max is a beautiful Great Dane. When Max is at the park he’s surrounded by people making a show of patting his head without bending over. Can you guess where Coda went first? Yes, Coda ran right past a wagging young Golden Retriever to crash into the park giant. Hello, Max.

Coda greeted Max by chewing on his leg. Standing beside the huge dog, Coda looked like a wee pup – wee being the operative word. Max stood like a gentleman while Coda tried to get his attention, then just as quietly Max lifted his leg and peed right on Coda’s head. Everyone laughed while I shook my head and said, “My husband picked out this dog.” As usual Coda was unfazed and shook off like he’d just had a bath. I think Max respected Coda’s reaction because Max then played with Coda. They’ve been great buddies ever since.

I began by saying Coda is the Dog Park Hoodlum, and he is. But every criminal came from somewhere and his baptism on that first park experience set the tone for more adventures to come. You see, Coda has lots of friends in the neighborhood and at the park. They grow so fast, and well, before we knew it Coda was running with the bad crowd. I think it’s time you meet Coda’s gang.